Originally published on Medium.com Feb 22, 2020·4 min read
I’m in an interesting space today. Without getting into all the details, I wanted to share how I have learned how to process things.
Last night, I was faced with a challenging conversation at my day job. Came out of the blue and took me off guard. I have to put in a disclaimer right now and that is I don’t feel comfortable talking about myself and my personal journey. I’m a private person now moving into the public eye.
Yet, I realize that many of us face similar situations and there are two paths we can go down —and we get to choose which one!
Let me repeat that last line — We get to choose.
Life is going to happen- people, situations, events — we have no control. Where we do have control is over ourselves and how we react!
I once heard, and I cannot remember from what brilliant person, the quote:
God please lift the veil so that I can see circumstances for what they truly are…
I love that quote and it’s something I say every morning.
As I move back into last night, thoughts ran through my head, victim thoughts, thoughts of how this was unfair. And maybe it was, considering all that I offer to the company and how proud I am to work there.
That being said, I truly desire so much more! I truly desire to have my own company, which I have created, NEWLAND WELLNESS. And as much as I am grateful for where I am because I love what I do there, I am not doing what I love!
Can anyone else relate to this: You love what you do, but you’re not doing what you love?
After the conversation, I spent time mulling over in my head what was said and what I could have added if I had thought about it. I could easily have reached out to people with the “Can you believe what happened last night….” drama filled conversations that would have prolonged my suffering and accomplished nothing in the long run.
Instead, I kept it to myself and went within. Slept on it and looked to find what I could learn from the interaction. And here’s what I discovered:
I am comfortable where I am and though it’s mundane, I enjoy my time and could easily continue on, or even find another job. Then I could work my own business part time on the side. It’s actually a practical plan when I think of it.
My mind may want that, but my heart wants something more.
My heart wants me to stand on my own two feet, step out into the unknown as scary as that is, and move into my passion! My mind doubts, my heart knows.
The conversation last night was confirmation to me to keep moving forward to follow my heart and not let my head get in the way.
Haven’t I been in other situations where it was scary, I was facing the unknown, but had no choice but to move forward? And I did and in looking back see it helped me grow. I ended up better off for it.
Can you relate? You too have been through or are going through challenges, that could really be looked as opportunities to grow — to be that better version of you.
Before I sat down to write this, I happened to be cleaning, something I do on Saturday mornings. I was in my bathroom around my tub moving objects. As I lifted a big wooden bowl with some decorations in it, a wooden hand held massage roller fell out and toppled onto a glass vase I had with some blue stones in it.
I watched it fall, and heard it clink — and expected it to shatter. Instead, to my surprise, nothing happened. It stayed intact. I realized it was a sign for me…
…this beautiful, delicate vase was stronger than I had imagined. And then it hit me:
I am stronger than I imagine. Life drops things on me, and I don’t break. I become even stronger.
It was in that moment that I said a grateful “Thank you” not only for my vase being saved, but to the person I had the conversation with last night.
This person need not know my feelings, but I am grateful for the opportunity last night played in moving me forward. I am more determined than ever to step into the unknown, move into my vision and see where it takes me.
Until next time~